Well, John. You are probably never going to make this dressing, but I'm posting it here for the world. (i.e., Elaine.)

Aunt Susie's Celery Seed Dressing

1 cup oil (I use canola or plain vegetable)
1 medium onion, quartered (unless you don't have a blender; then you have to grate it.)
1 tsp salt
1 tsp dry mustard
9 TBS. sugar (I know. I know.)
1/2 cup white vinegar
1 TBS celery seed

Mix oil, onion salt, mustard & sugar in blender.
Blend well to combine.
After the ingredients above are combined, slowly add the vinegar and celery seed while blending on low speed.

This dressing keeps well in the fridge. For a very long time. Good thing, too. It makes a lot. It's awesome in any sweet/sour combo, fabulous with Gorgonzola and pears and pecans and ... and .....

Mashed Potatoes Grandma-Style

This is so not brain surgery. You need the right potatoes. There's debate. But generally use potatoes labeled Russet. Russet sounds like "red" to me, but these are not redskins. They're brown skinned, usually Idahoes. OR use yellow tinged potatoes like Yukon Golds which give you a smooth, buttery appearance. Green Giant sells a yellow Yukon look-alike that seems to work fine as well. (Not frozen or anything, just Green Giant's brand on the bag in the fresh veggie aisle.)

Peel the potatoes (I'd say about six-eight medium sized ones for your first attempt) and as you peel them, put them into a bowl of cold water. Potatoes turn brown if they're exposed to the air after they're peeled. Cut them in quarters lengthwise or just slice them thickly. (Your Grandma Snider figured this out kind of at the end of her potato career. They cook a little faster if you slice them. No biggie.) Put them in a pan big enough to hold them comfortably and cover with cold water. (Cold water is the rule.) Salt the water a bit, but don't go overboard. Cover the pan, bring to boil, simmer for approx 20 min or until they're tender when pierced with a knife. Don't overcook them, but don't be paranoid either. While you're simmering the potatoes also warm about 3/4 cup milk over low heat or in a microwave safe cup.

Drain them in your colander and then return to the pan. And melt a couple TBS. of butter with the milk, too.

Be sure you're using a pot with a sturdy bottom. Or a bowl that can take some abuse. Don't put the hand mixer into the bottom of a non-stick pot for example. It'll flake the Teflon off. Use the mixer or the manual masher and break up the potatoes into small bits. Then add the milk a little at a time and beat/mix as you go. Look for the texture you like, just keep mashing and adding milk until things are smooth. Add a little more butter! Salt, but don't go overboard. Taste them. They'll taste good. This takes a little practice but it's hard to screw up.

Enjoy!